Your weekly dose of 80's Bollywood Cheese

Just in time for the Abhishek/Aishwarya appearance on Oprah later this afternoon we present the big AB himself along with the reigning queen from down southside, Sridevi. Yes, the song is from a movie that is a quarter century old (!) but it's a jam that can stand alongside the best of them. Some remarks from fans of the song include:

Sonal: OMG!! what sort of dance are they doing? love it!! and sridevi in her prime!!

Nehal: I think that this jam is on one of the greatest compilations I own... a little something entitled the 'Rarest and Sweetest'. Great tune. I didn't know that this was the '80s. These outfits currently exist in our wardrobe. Reetu and I performed this at home last night.

Nafisa: I LOVE this song! And i would so rock that shiny, stripy dress Sri Devi is wearing in the beginning if I had it :/

G: Why aren't those rockin' sleeveless shirts still fashionable dammit?!?

To which the staffers here at Doc Bollywood say...

Sonal - not sure what kind of dance they are doing but we all need to learn it and perform it at our next together which leads us to...

Nehal - there is no other compilation album this song could have been on. you will have to teach us all the dance and let us wear the outfits which leads us to...

Nafi - you would totally rock that dress and it appears that reetu will be able to let you borrow it which leads us to...

G - if we look in nehal's closet we will see that sleeveless shirts are not only still fashionable, they are still being worn.

From the 1984 movie 'Inquillab' about being bitten by a scorpion and equating it to falling in love. The song is just dandy and sung with great gusto by Kishore & Asha. The movie never was a huge hit but combined with the cheez fashion, cheez lyrics (complete with subtitles), cheez dancing and of course 2 of the biggest stars in Bollywood history, it's been one of my favorites through the years. And as an added bonus I believe Beth (from Beth Loves Bollywood) stayed at the resort where this was filmed!

Your weekly dose of 80's Bollywood Cheese

Welcome to a new segment from your friends over at Doc Bollywood - a weekly dose of 80's Bollywood Cheese. I am a child of the 80's and it was during that time that my love of Bollywood was truly cultivated and brought to it's zenith (or Zeenat;). Why the 80's? It was then that I started junior high school, began to watch Indian movies in earnest with the advent of VHS tapes and was an unabashed fanboy of Amitabh with Kishore Kumar providing the playback duties for most of my favorite songs. The 80's were a great time in Bollywood with disco having arrived on India's shores (years after it's demise in the US) and the music maestros of Bombay combined those sounds with just the right amount of desiness to make an original sound all their own.

80's Bollywood Cheese is a segment where the movie itself is not really celebrated or discussed because many of them, like today's entry, are forgotten for reasons big and small. Also, in the spirit of 'The Princess Bride' we are not making fun of the songs being presented but are celebrating them in all their past glory for posterity's sake. Mainly though this segment gives a chance for those of us who grew up in that era to relive some fantastic tunes, to give newcomers to Bollywood a chance to see an era that is oftentimes ignored by the media and to provide some needed pizaaz to the daily grind that is life. Enjoy!

Today's song comes to us from 'Nauker Biwi Ka' a 1983 movie I saw at the drive in theater in Ahmedabad (India). Having never been to a drive in movie in America I can't really compare the experience to over there but it was just magical. From the amazing food to the cavalcade of friends & family that were present - it was just a magical experience that unfortunately is part of an era that is no more. But that one night has stayed with me all those years as well as this amazing song.

Kya Naam Hai Tera is sung by Kishore Kumar & Lata and has precious little to do with the rest of the movie. It stars Rishi Kapoor and Reena Roy singing to eachother about their nicknames (he was popularly known as Chintu) leading to the chorus of "Dance with the music, romance with the music". Great dance routines, awesome outfits, amazing tune and of course lots and lots of colors - what else can you ask for?

Hum Kisise Kum Naheen (1977)

70's Bollywood movies are some of our group's favorite ones to watch. The tantalizing tunes, fantastic fashions, kaleidoscope of colors and symphony of stars make them a great choice for group viewing. When one of these movies is hitting on all cylinders the result is escapism in it's finest form as well as a treat for the senses. The filmmakers made these movies with reckless abandon and created some priceless Bollyweed along the way (meaning they were either smoking something while it was being made or you need to in order to fully enjoy them). But what happens when the excesses go to far? When the aforementioned filmmaker puts together all the elements of a classic masala movie but doesn't get the ingredients in quite right? Well what you get is an almost good movie that instead serves notice that sometimes more is indeed less. One of the last directorial ventures by the iconic Nasir Hussain will best be remembered for the fact that I was more confused by the plot line of this movie than by any other movie in recent history. And yes, I know I have said that plot is the least important part of any 70's Bollywood masala movie but it needs to at least be there for god's sake.

But wait Doc, there is a plot isn't there? You can't go for 162 minutes without a coherent plot! Or can you? This is the synopsis of the movie from the back of my DVD - it may confuse you but watching the actual movie may confuse you even more...



Rajesh's (Rishi Kapoor) father, a rich business man winds up his business in Africa and starts off for India with diamonds worth Rupees twenty five crores. The diamonds were hidden in a leather belt with him when he died at Beirut Airport(!). Before dying, he gave the belt to one Mr. Kishorilal and requested him to take his life's savings to his son Rajesh. But Rajesh does not get the diamonds. The diamond belt mysteriously finds it's way into a bicycle tool box belonging to Sanjay (Tariq) who is not even aware of it.
In his search for the diamonds Rajesh comes across Kaajal (Kaajal Kiran), Kishorilal's only daughter. Kaajal in childhood was betrothed to Sanjay but in a cruel twist of fate was separated from him. The two young men, Rajesh & Sanjay, create such a tremendous emotional dilemma in Kaajal's life that she is unable to decide which one will be the right choice. But a more explosive situation is created when Saudagar Singh (Amjad Khan), an international criminal, turns Rajesh, Sanjay & Kaajal into pawns. Saudagar Singh has pursued the diamonds from Africa to India. Who gets the diamonds eventually - Saudagar or Sanjay? Who saves Kaajal's life and wins her love - Rajesh or Sanjay? This is the fabulous and colourful story of romance and intrigue of 'Hum Kisise Kum Nahin'!



What was most maddening about this movie is that Nasir Husain chose NOT to focus on two of the most charismatic stars in Bollywood (Rishi & Zeenat Aman - who is not even mentioned in the plot synopsis) but instead handed it over to two unknowns who just did not have the gravitas to carry such a bloated film. Granted, Rishi & Zeenat may have not been able to either but at least we would have had them in the majority of the movie and perhaps that would have been enough. But it wasn't meant to be and the movie just didn't do it for me. It went on to win several Filmfare Awards including two for Rafi for playback singing, one for the art direction and one for the cinematography. This movie does have something amazing going for it though - R.D. Burman's chart topping and jaw dropping soundtrack. Nasir Husain demanded that Kishore & Rafi get an equal number of songs and in this round it was Rafi that came out the clear winner. The song for today is sung by Asha Bhonsle (aka Mrs R.D. Burman) & Rafiji and is the title track as well as quite possibly the greatest quwalli EVER in the history of Bollywood. Zeenat may not be the star of the movie but she completely takes it over during her rendition of it's title track - I dare you not to get goosebumps when Asha starts singing, it's that good.



Our group viewing included 2 Bollywood virgins and I hate to think that they never tried another one after their misadventure with this one. As various members of our party either fell asleep or got up to start getting ready for that evening, our friend Eric stayed behind watching intently. No matter how ludicrous or inane the movie became, he never moved. Finally, after the umpteenth gunfight (aka needless plot extension )I finally asked him, "Eric, what the hell are you doing?". He looked at me and simply said "I need to know what happened to the diamonds". Well Eric, the below screen caps and synopsis are for you and so everyone can feel they saw the movie and then proceed to watch all the songs on youtube. Warning - the below screenshots may actually entice you to want to see the movie but enjoy them here and only here. Consider yourself warned ;)

The movie begins with a letter from a father to a son~



Followed by a completely unnecessary plot detail (so Beirut was at one time considered exotic? Interesting).



We then learn a little about Rajesh. That he is a great dancer and has AWESOME fashion sense.



This guy looks nefarious but again, a complete mismanagement of star power by NOT using Amjad Khan in more of the movie.



The only saving grace from the goonda camp. These are Kaajal's bodyguards and I am still not sure whether they were meant to be scary or funny - they turned out to be scarily funny (like four Curlys from the Three Stooges).



Flashback to a scene with these lovely two urchins singing the second of three signature songs from the movie, 'Kya Hua Tera Vaada?'. During this whole scene the two fathers agree that the kids will indeed be married someday but instead they get separated by the cruel hands of fate.



Father & son track down the lovely Kaajal's whereabouts and remind her dad of the 'vaada' he made years ago regarding their future. I just love the turban on Shri Ram Lagoo here. Anyway, they are shooed away by Kaajal's dad because he has become stupid rich over the years and they just aren't a good match anymore. Boo!



OK - this is where the fuzziness really begins. Somehow Sanjay starts working for Rajesh (as his manager) and Kaajal is sent to meet Rajesh for a possible 'rishtaa'. Sanjay sees Kaajal and pretends to be Rajesh with the four Curlys standing guard behind her.



Kaajal tells Sanjay that she can't go anywhere without her goons so they decide to ditch them for a day out on the town. This is the goon's 'which way did they go George' look.



Quite possibly my 2nd favorite scene in the movie. While out and about with Sanjay (having successfully ditched the Curlys) Kaajal gets her hands on some balloons and floats away during 'Yeh Ladka Hai Allah'. Colors colors colors!



The real Rajesh (aka Rishi Kapoor) shows up while Sanjay does his best 'Who Me?' look. Somehow during all this I think Sanjay has figured out that Kaajal is his childhood sweetheart, still not sure when that exactly happened though.



Rajesh tries his hand at wooing Kaajal since he was the one who was supposed to do it in the first place and does a splendid job of it. He is freaking Rishi Kapoor after all!



To get to the aforementioned programme, Rajesh needs to do something about the Curlys. He puts something in their chai that doesn't quite agree with them, hilarity ensues!



Is it? Could it be? I think it is... DANCE OFF 70'S SHTYLE!!!!!!!!



I got my own backup band, my nickname is Chintu and I got yet ANOTHER amazing white outfit to do battle with you in, what you got to say now playah?



Rajesh wins a Kaajal for his efforts, was there any doubt to the winner of this one?



Not trying to tell you how to do your job Mr. Husain and granted, I am extremely thankful that you decided to put Zeenat into the movie at this point but what the hell happened? I thought Rajesh just won over Kaajal but out of nowhere you magically add Sunita (Zeenat Aman in an uncredited role) to the mix? So confused but can't... stop... watching.



Immediately after the above scene (really) we find out that Sunita has told Rajesh (for unknown reasons) that she can't marry him and so begins the signature scene of the movie with a quwalli for the ages, 'Hum Kisise Kum Nahin'.



Obligatory shot of Zeenat looking both pained and drop dead gorgeous. Rajesh is basically calling her out on her sudden about face at their blossoming love affair.



She takes the bait and then proceeds to take over the move in less than two minutes of screen time (with a little help from Asha Bhonsle).



OK, so by this point I am completely lost and have no idea why Rajesh called Kaajal out for a mountainside picnic when it's clear that Sunita has reciprocated his feelings for her. I just included this shot for the fabulous brown ALL LEATHER SUIT that Rajesh is sporting. Oh, and Sunita disappears, again.



Rajesh takes Kaajal out for dinner and look who just happens to be the entertainment for the evening - it's Sanjay (in a most unfortunate headband)!



And it's signature song number three of the movie - the one that the two childhood sweethearts sang to eachother wayyyyyyyyyyyyyy back in the beginning of the movie. Except this time Sanjay is ASKING Kaajal, "what did happen to your promise?". It all comes together for Kaajal and she is a bit overwhelmed at it all.



Somehow everyone figures out who eachother is and Eric finally gets an answer to his question about what happened to those diamonds. Unfortunately, no one else but him cares about them at this point.



A really really really REALLY long gun battle erupts over the diamonds even though it's clear that no one was around for the big reveal. I love this shot of the gun toting goondas coming after our band of misfits. Why? Because they are wearing matching outfits with matching leather vests to boot, bravo costume designer, bravo.



Now that Rajesh has figured out that Sanjay and Kaajal were meant to be he writes her a letter telling her so. After writing the letter he decides to immediately leave town.



On his way OUT of town he runs into Sanjay coming back INTO town. After reuniting our two doomed lovers (and his dad) the too cute couple ask Rajesh about any parting words of wisdom. I swear that Sanjay is wearing more makeup than Kaajal here but that killer scarf makes up for it.



Guess who else was coming back INTO town to find Sanjay? Yes, our lovely Sunita was if for no other reason than to put a tidy bow of completion on this glorious mess of a movie. Rajesh's advice is what else but the title of the movie? Yes, it makes no sense here but nothing much else did so what's the problem? Zeenat & Rishi - thanks for the memories...

Rangeela (1995)

Today's post is a joint venture with our friend Ajnabi over at Paisa Vasool (or Not). By her own admission she is a relative newbie to the world of Bollywood but her fresh view on the medium clearly shows that she 'gets it' just as well as those of us who have grown up loving it.

It was the summer of 1995 and I had just graduated from med school with only four weeks separating my last gasp of student life and the beginning of residency, aka my first real job. So I decided to take a quick trip to India to recalibrate my soul and took my buddy Hasan on the assignment with me. We landed in Bombay and after checking in to our hotel we decided to seek out the legendary 'Metro Theater' and watch whatever movie that happened to be playing there. The Metro was built in 1938 by MGM Studios (thus the name) and was THE premiere place for both Bollywood and Hollywood movies released in India for over half a century. With almost 1500 seats and a pedigree up there with the best cinema halls in the world we knew that we would not be disappointed no matter what movie was being shown.



International flights to India invariably arrive in darkness and very early in the morning thus allowing one to get right to sightseeing if sleep can be successfully fought off. We had a lovely breakfast of chai & biscuits on Juhu Beach and arrived at the theater in time for the noon show. The scene that awaited us was nothing short of chaos - throngs of people, police literally beating back the crowds with sticks and jolted us into the reality that we were indeed in the birthplace of Bollywood. The sign out front which read 'House Full' did nothing to deter us and from previous experiences we knew the next step was to find the guy selling 'tickets in black' with those magic words रंगीला written on a piece of wafer thin paper.



There were several scalpers about and they were all surrounded by desperate moviegoers looking to make a deal - in fact the whole thing resembled what the trading floor on Wall Street must look like. When our turn came we were offered the ever elusive balcony ticket and to make the deal even sweeter, with it we were entitled to get in 15 minutes early to see a 'Super Duper Laser Show Production featuring The Spirit of Rangeela'. How could we say no to that even though the Rs 150 we were forking over were six times the original price? We got our snacks/popcorn/Thumbs Up and were ushered promptly into our seats for the start of an incredible first day in India. Yes, the laser show was in reality a bunch of spinning lights on a globe and the Thumbs Up could have been a little colder but at that point we were just having too much fun and the movie itself did not disappoint one bit.



'Rangeela' was the first soundtrack made for a Hindi film by A.R. Rahman and alot of careers were riding on it's success. Ram Gopal Verma had no real hits to his name and other than a role as a child in 'Masoom', Urmila was a virtually unknown actress. Aamir Khan was an established name but had a couple of flops prior to the release and there as in Hollywood, you are only good as your last movie. Only Jackie Shroff (or Jaggu Dada as he is affectionately known in his native Gujarat) was a proven name but had been given a supporting role and ironically was playing a movie star. The careers of all the principal players were never the same as the charisma of the two leads and the popularity of the soundtrack propelled this movie into becoming one of the biggest hits of the year.



Playing the street smart orphan Munna (Aamir Khan) whose friendship with the starlet who dreams of making it big Mili (Urmila) and how their relationship gets tested when a Bollywood actor Raj Kamal (Jackie Shroff) gets into the fray made for an immensely watchable plot. Aamir Khan's dialogues and delivery using the slangish Bombay Hindi was something not seen since Amitabh did it to perfection with 'Don' almost twenty years earlier. And Urmila, playing Mili with equal parts sweetness and vamp, earned herself a Filmfare Award nomination for best actress. One of my favorite scenes from the movie finds Munna (in an attempt to show Mili that he is indeed as suave as that lout of a Bollywood actor Raj Kamal) donning a YELLOW suit and taking Mili to the Oberoi Sheraton where he is (unknowingly) foiled by an autograph signing Raj Kamal. Sweet, funny and tragic all in one fell swoop.



Yes, at the end of the day it's the soft heart under the tough exterior of Munna & the real feelings of Mili under her desire to become of a movie star that make this movie a must see for any Bollywood fan. But let's not forget about the landscape changing soundtrack that shook up the very foundations of popular filmi music as to why this movie is still so fondly remembered today. A.R. Rahman snagged a record 3 trophies at the Filmfare Awards that year - best Hindi soundtrack for 'Rangeela', R.D. Burman award for best newcomer for 'Rangeela' and best Tamil soundtrack for 'Bombay' (whose songs were later recorded in Hindi for it's subsequent release worldwide). Video of title track below



Rahman's mix of East/West sounds that never strayed far from their Indian roots were reminiscent of Bollywood soundtracks from the 60's but carry his unique signature on them . The catchy songs don't sound dated and are as fresh and lively today as are all of Rahman's recordings to date. My favorite song from the movie is Yaaron Sun Lo Zara sung by Udit Narayan & Chitra. As far as the rest of mine and Hasan's trip went, suffice it to say that it couldn't have gone wrong after a beginning like that and that it concluded with cold beer & prawns on a beach in Goa watching a beautiful sunset while our new Goan friends cooked us a meal on an open fire behind us, but that's a story for another day ;)



The above picture (taken this year by the way) has absolutely nothing to do with the movie but is just a little bonus for all the Urmila Mantodkar fans out there. With her combination of looks and talent I just can't fathom why we don't see her in more movies.

Nishant (1975) & farewell to Akbar Ali Khan

Based on a true story, Nishant was avant garde filmmaker Shyam Benegal's sophomore effort (after Ankur) and with it he brought back what would be his favorite muse for her second movie as well, Shabana Azmi. If you are looking for the prototypical Bollywood naach-gaana fest then this is not your type of film. It is (at times) difficult to watch, has no songs, contains very little music and has a feel as bleak as the dusty village where it was shot. But as I have said before, I appreciate it when a film challenges the viewer and though you may not like what you see on screen, 'Nishant' delivers an emotional wallop like few films do.

A virtual 'Who's Who' of Indian cinema star in this movie including the aforementioned Shabana Azmi, Nasureedin Shah (in his debut), Kulbushan Kharbanda, Amrish Puri, Girish Karnad and a smoldering 19 year old Smita Patil appearing in just her second movie. Nishant went on to win the prestigious National Award for Hindi Cinema in 1975 and was officially selected as a nominee for the Palm D'Or at the Cannes Film Festival. The story is unsettling and at times infuriating but the film itself is compelling if only for the fact that it shows something different and gives the movie fan a chance to see so many living legends of Indian cinema in their early days.



We are introduced to the character of the Zamindar (a surprisingly buff Amrish Puri) early on in the film as someone who is not to be taken lightly. He takes whatever he wants from whomever he wants without any disregard to how his actions affect others. Ironically he is shown to be a highly religious man and the very villagers who loathe his presence are forced to seek his blessings on all auspicious occasions.



The underrated Girish Karnad plays the new schoolmaster of the village who arrives with his beautiful wife and young son but soon comes to see the ugly truth of his new surroundings. The Zamindar has 3 younger brothers who all share his sense of entitlement and in this scene are explaining how the schoolmaster can make extra money by letting them 'borrow' his wife for the evening.



Shaken by the brazen disregard for societal norms, he spends that evening sitting with his family in their modest surroundings. Having told the brothers that he is not interested in their offer he does not suspect (nor does the audience) that his wife would soon be kidnapped in full view of the entire village from his home. Unable to stop them on his own he begs the villagers to help him and then goes to register a complaint at the local police station.




Patel (Kulbushan Kharbanda) is the policeman who feels for this man but knows he is powerless to do anything about the abduction. It would have been easy to make the cop a caricature and dismissive of any complaints against the powerful family. But Kharbanda's take on the role is to make an almost sympathetic character who at the end of the day is a coward but one who the audience understands is just a cog in the powerful machine that is the Zamindar's world.



Rape scenes in any movie are difficult to watch but few of them convey the feeling of bleakness so subtly as this movie does. The morning after Sushila (Shabana Azmi) is abducted and brutally raped by the brothers of the Zamindaar begins with the aerial shot above. No words nor any music accompany the scene and the silence is what makes digesting what has just happened even more horrific.



Shushila is kept as a prisoner in the house for most of the movie while her husband tries in vain to get her out. Watching his attempts to help her by talking to the police all the way up to the government officials fall on deaf ears all while she is getting brutalized night after night is numbing. I almost wanted the schoolteacher to bust down the door of the house Amitabh-style and teach them all a lesson with a good thrashing but unfortunately Bollywood doesn't always work like that. Much of the story takes place during this part of the movie - the schoolteacher finally taking his story to the priest who, as a man of god, decides there is a limit to evil, Sushila's resentment towards the husband that is letting her languish in this house of horrors every day, the youngest brother's Vishwam (Nasureedin Shah) growing infatuation with Sushila and his wife Rukhmani's (Smita Patil) disgust with everything that she is witness to.



Nasureedin Shah's first film role introduces us to a spineless character (Vishwam) that we are not used to seeing him play. Not entirely comfortable with the way his brothers treat women as objects he nonetheless joins in the fray the first time he sees Sushila. As his feelings for her grow stronger it puts an enormous strain on the relationship with his wife Rukhmani and it is through this deft ability to hold his own ground around these two powerful actresses that a star is born.



And last but not least we have Smita Patil in the role of the long suffering wife Rukhmani. Her presence in the film elevates it into art every time she appears onscreen. Her transformation from a passive wife who tolerates what goes on around her to one that eventually becomes disgusted with what she is witness to is powerfull and proves as another reminder that she was taken from us entirely too early at the age of 31. Watching the movie hurtle towards it's powerful and controversial ending is not easy but then again, real life never is.



Ali Akbar Khan, the foremost virtuoso of the lutelike sarod, whose dazzling technique and gift for melodic invention, often on display in concert with his brother-in-law Ravi Shankar, helped popularize North Indian classical music in the West, died on Thursday at his home in San Anselmo, Calif at the age of 87. His father was a stern, sometimes brutal taskmaster, rousing his young son at dawn for several hours of practice before breakfast and continuing well into the evening of what were often 18-hour days. Allauddin Khan had elevated the status of instrumental music, previously regarded as inferior to vocal performance, by synthesizing various regional styles into a modern concert style. His son absorbed his encyclopedic knowledge of North Indian music and eventually outstripped him as an instrumentalist. The song for today is Water Lady (Panihari) from the album 'Garden of Dreams'. Ustad (honorary title meaning master) Khan and a thirteen-piece East/West orchestra perform classical ragas and Rajasthani folk songs. Combining sarod with Western classical instruments such as the cello, violin, bassoon and oboe, Khansaab brilliantly merges Eastern and Western musical traditions to produce an album of astounding beauty.